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Wednesday, July 30, 2003
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Not much to WonderBlog, but usually that means I'm busy getting into some kinda trouble.
So, yeah, I'm up to no good. Hopefully it'll be up before summer's over *crossing fingers*
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Sunday, July 27, 2003
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MoronCam - Caution: Subject may show extremely graphic signs of boredom.
 
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Friday, July 25, 2003
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Thursday, July 24, 2003
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It's that time, kids.
Yep, that's right, it's yet again time for the segment we all know and love, it's *drumroll*
Ape's WonderBlog BS quote of the Week!
Today's letter comes all the way from Delusionville, USA, sent in by *&#@!
*that's funny*
Uh, sent in by *!~+#
...Hmm. My computer seems to have a glitch, it's not letting me type the name out. Eh well, let's just call them Bilbo, shall we?
Bilbo Writes: "Apolo's good behavior inspires us, so we say, and if that's true
it should show in OUR actions."
Hmm, rightfully said, Bilbo. Apolo is quite the inspiration to us all. I mean, I've licked my fingers raw turning page after page of letters of Apolo's inspiring aura. Why, he's inspired working mothers to hijack their families across the globe just to get a glimpse of him. He's captivated married couples to spend $500+ (exact dollar/cent amount will be given on request. Amounts are important) to spend their anniversary watching him eat rare steak and flip his hair from afar. You know, his inspiration has gone so far as to move some to fill the homeless with wonder by coaxing them to, in the vibe of the great philosopher Destiny's Child, Say His Name, Say His Name in hopes that it would change their life....or at the very least give you a chuckle while you toss him some spare change.
I hope that you drop other tidbits of wise sayings our way, Bilbo. But I can't help but wonder what Apolo would find more important...the action? Or the motive behind the action? Apolo's graciousness and patience with people is definitely a quality I give him my utmost respect for...but then again, honestly, he knows so little about these individuals. Maybe it's better that way.
Stay tuned to WonderBlog next time, when we discuss quotes on the topic Is it wise to Donate & Tell?
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Wednesday, July 23, 2003
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Come again? Uh, better yet, don't.
I'm finally singing the praises of a day without fear of catching clothing on fire, or my eyes frying clean out of the sockets, a day under triple digits. You laugh and mock, thinking I'm a whinner, but I'm the one that's had to fire-proof my shoes on every trip out the front door.
My online resume is complete. There's a job for an Online Digital Image Editor working for the Daily Camera in Boulder, CO that I would give my left eye for at this very moment. Fortunate for...well, anyone but me, I lack the funds to uproot to CO just yet. I hate when life always feels like a massive jigzaw puzzle that you're just waiting for the pieces to fit in the right places for everything to finally make sense...or at least give you an idea of what the hell you're doing. Ok, that type of thinking comes straight from the part of me that is anixous to jump into something if I'm not completely sure of the outcome. I think I'm one risky decision away from the rest of my life...
< /theropy session >
Hmm, what's new on the menu for Ape's WonderLife? Weight loss. Who would have thought these two fairly non-threatening words would become the biggest lump in my throat - or is that my ass..? Nevertheless, it's going to happen this time. Little did I know (or maybe next time I'll actually read the fine print) that to chase an athlete EH, the SPORT of Short Track, one must pretty much be in Olympic top form. Silly me thinking one only needed to be in an Olympic top...I've already purchased one of those. Didn't do a thing.
Top 3 reasons for weight loss
3. It's always desirable when the members of the media at world cups can actually FIT in the media box.
2. I always wondered why everyone clears the ice when I walk out - no no, the real Zamboni comes out in 3 minutes
1. I'll finally get to show the world the April that I've always wanted them to see.
So yeah, new life begins now.
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Saturday, July 19, 2003
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Random blurbs of excitment
Just got back from the Skate Town ice arena in Roseville. And yes, my ass was on ice skates for the first time in over 7, uh 9, well a long time, ok? I drug along my younger sibling, since my plan to make her Olypmic Short Track material by 2010 should be will underway, and we were both pretty nervous.
Let me just say that I'm renting hockey skates next time, dammit. By an act of God, I was able to produce a few spins, some partly effective cross-overs, but my knees wobbled like Elvis after one too many nights at the Jailhouse. They have these crazy contraptions that look like metal walkers for the elderly, but supposedly these are to help the beginners (or those who've had no experience at walking a straight line) manuveur around the ice. All the young kids were using them, and my sister and I nearly lost a shin trying to dodge these 7 year olds, which to me looked as though they were playing a game of "how many unsuspecting suckers can we take out with this medal thing".
Yikes. It was amazing to step on the ice though. I'm so use to inline rollerskates that are heavy, clunky, and sort of keep you planted to the ground. Ice skates are a whole different enchilada, they're so light, and you feel like one false move, or maybe even one good move, will send you barrling for the exit, via "your face". I guess I got the jist of it after warming up, but as I got comfortable I wanted to go faster, which the damn figure skates don't really allow. Forget the fancy stuff, I can live without doing twirls - since I was 11 I've been fascinated with speedskating, more importantly the word speed. The Roseville arena is such a nice rink, one of the best in NorCal I think. Besides being a really good workout (dodging flying objects, in fear of your life, it makes ya sweat, you know?), it's just very calming. And when you're not frying eggs on your driveway, or reaching for a blunt utencil to bludgen yourself if you see another weeks forcast of over 100 degrees, it's the best place to spend your time.
Other tidbits
1. About to send in request for Marquette Press Accreditation
2. Just received in the mail my Cute-as-a-button SLC 2002 RMH pin for my donation
3. Bought 800 speed film to take a whirl at my new Nikon FM SLR with 200mm lens - MAN, I love the sound of that.
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What does an Ape do at nearly 3am when she can't sleep?
Why, make animations of the Sexiest Mofo on the planet in the attempt to make him look even more sexy, of course. Psh, and you thought I played online poker all night.
Now, when watching this loveliness below, follow these easy steps:
1. Watch
2. Sweat
3. Swoon/Drool, respectively
4. Repeat steps 1-3 x 4-eVeR
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Wednesday, July 16, 2003
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Reason # 666 on why to own a shot gun
All it took was for me to swank out of town, and it happens. Let me remind you all that Sacramento isn't the ghetto, it's simply the one street adjacent from my street that inhabits every thieving scum of the earth - and a few demon possessed high strung cocker spaniels.
My younger sister had left her CD case on the back seat of my Mazda Protegè - basically it had "steal me" all over it. While I was gone, they busted my back window & stole the CD's. And believe me, I have a feeling what little dickwads are responsible...just teenagers with nothing better to do in life than make me shell out $145 for a new power window.
Remembering "La Bella Sera"
A huge thank you to Junko for sending me this photo of Apolo and I at the Luau!
In Other News
What guy do you know isn't going to be thrilled outta his pants to learn this?
Masterbating lowers Prostate Cancer Risk - Study
ROFL.
And....
The Poopsmith's bio. Don't drink or eat anything while viewing.
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Tuesday, July 15, 2003
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Wow, long time to blog. Alas, the ape is still alive. I'm not sure what's up with this "havin' a life" thing, but it's really starting to scare me.
More meaningful posts to come...I hope. Well, maybe. Ok, don't hold your breath.
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Monday, July 07, 2003
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Your Name and Personality (stolen from Yano)
April
"Your name of April gives you the ability to be creative along practical lines of endeavour. Your ideas can be very original and inventive. You enjoy being with people in a social environment. Your personal appearance is important to you, for you desire to make a good impression on others. Your pleasant manner attracts people to you with their problems and you are capable of offering practical advice, though you would probably not follow such advice yourself. This name causes you to be somewhat too concerned with the personalities, problems, and activities of other people. You seem positive and decisive and can be outspoken in the expression of your opinions, but you lack the self-confidence needed to follow through with your ideas and plans. Procrastination is your downfall. You frequently choose the path of least resistance to avoid your responsibilities. It is not easy for you to overcome obstacles or face issues. This name does you an injustice in that it restricts your success in business and personal pursuits through a lack of ambition. There is a weakness in the fluid functions and in the region of the head resulting in sinus problems, headaches, eye, ear, or throat conditions and related ailments."
Yikes. Ain't all THAT the truth. Although, I think as I've gotten older my ambition has been on the rise...but all that about the sinus trouble, damn, that's me. Thanks a lot April.
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- blowin' up the 4th -
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Sunday, July 06, 2003
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Blowin' up the 4th
The whole house was full of people, which is the norm on this holiday. My mother's side showed up in full force, and since we're definitely not known for our quiet sides, a good time was bound to happen.
My uncle pulls up the truck, and drags in his karaoke machine, mics, speakers, you name it - it was up, runnin' and blinkin' like the Vegas strip. Of course, I see a mic and I can't help but make a fool of myself. Our mix ranged anything from 80's classics from Cyndi Lauper and Madonna, to 50's style "Cherrie Baby" care of the Four Seasons. I can't get enough of corny tuff chick 80's hits, so I sang Hit me with your best shot, by Pat Benatar. It was bad...and even though the only thing missing was cigarette smoke, big breasted waitresses, and that scary biker dude usually nursing the corona at table 19...we had a complete blast. Maybe because there's no one more fun to laugh and make fun of than your family.
All the cousins scurrying, no, barreling through the house, loud music in the garage, and the smell of everything that used to be grazing a lowly field somewhere - burninating on the grill. I sang & laughed (more of the latter), and so much so that my throats been less than par all day today. I managed to snap some shots of the chaos...
 
 
 
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Saturday, July 05, 2003
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Attention WonderBlog readers
I'm now going to use my own server for my blogging purposes, just because that ad at the top of the page is really getting on my last nerve. So, please change your links to:
http://st-gear.com/april
From here on in I'll be blogging from the new location...not to mention blogging ad free *whew*
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Name: April