- - Sunday, November 09, 2003 I cherish my weekends. Weekends are almost as important as arranging my world cup photos according to date, time, ass content...yeah, now you know I love me some friday. Isn't it true that everyone of us working stiffs are always racing toward the weekend. Livin' for friday. Usually, I'd say something really PC like, "we shouldn't rush through the week, because you'll miss the everyday little things in life". *ape tears the script to this post* Little things? Things like going cross-eyed watching the clock's second hand take it's SWEET time getting to the half hour mark, just so I can realize I've only been at work for 10 minutes. Or, my favorite - being so frazzled that I leap out of bed like a rabbit w/ a cortizone shot in his ass thinking I'm late for work, only to find half a lipstick tube all over my face later that it's my day off. The week has a way of mocking me shamelessly. But Friday comes, and all bets are off. Tunnel vision kicks in, and I sprint for my car, haul ass to my front door as if Anton was standing at the base of it, wearing nothing but a bandana, a turncable, and a smile. Yowsa. Holy Cripes, could you just imag...eh....ok, getting off track. I'll squeeze every moment out of this weekend like it's my last. Mow people over on the freeway because it's my weekend. Nod and smile, while I'm really drifting off because it's my weekend. Hold dear to my heart the 5 minutes of silence I get in my no-children-under-5 zone that I've created strategically around my front yard. "But Ape, don't you want tons of people to call, tons of things to do, places to be...?" To which I'd say, ARE YOU MENTAL? Why would I want to complicate my life with social activity, it's the WEEKEND!! Hell, if this is a sign of my old age, then bring on the denture cream and viagra. And when my weekend has reached it's end, I'll look Monday square in the eye, and a little something that goes like this....

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